Well, here are we, two simple Canadians, who are treading the internet for our first time!
But why, I know you will ask, is this so an important thing for you two famouse pople to do so? Well, my olds, I will tell. Mr Nuniwokingkac and me is not any the younger these days, and so we feel like touching more people - understand? Yes, truly, as time flies like the crow, we want to share ourselves, and hope you will agree.
We have met each a long time ago, Mr Nuniwokingkac and me, and we have tried many business - piano-moving, house repair, lifestyle coaches and now Frugal Colonial Foods, the true taste of the bush. What wonders our doughty ancestors arranged in their primitive outhouses! Share them with us. Our receipts are barely credible.
But first, oh dear, we must introduce ourselves, my olds.
Well then. Me, I am Mr Jaques Shellac, 
from Quebec, of course, and proud to be of the old trappist and hunter stock. You will see, of course, that I preserve the physiognomy of my type. I am firm of chin and enormous beard, as fits a man of the sim,ple kind. I have a large weapon that fires most trustily, and tha nks to this, the stock of Frugal Colonial Food is always most full and variable. Nothing is safe from my balls, believe me, my olds. In earliest life, I discover that I have this gift, thanks to my parents who many times were leaving me to play deep in the forest and alone, while they hid in jest from my little cries. How we laugh, my olds, when I would eventually crawl home to the cabin, but tomorrow we play again, they would say, ha ha petit Jaques, malheureusement tu es encore chez nous, pffaaah! But enough of my childhood plays.
from Quebec, of course, and proud to be of the old trappist and hunter stock. You will see, of course, that I preserve the physiognomy of my type. I am firm of chin and enormous beard, as fits a man of the sim,ple kind. I have a large weapon that fires most trustily, and tha nks to this, the stock of Frugal Colonial Food is always most full and variable. Nothing is safe from my balls, believe me, my olds. In earliest life, I discover that I have this gift, thanks to my parents who many times were leaving me to play deep in the forest and alone, while they hid in jest from my little cries. How we laugh, my olds, when I would eventually crawl home to the cabin, but tomorrow we play again, they would say, ha ha petit Jaques, malheureusement tu es encore chez nous, pffaaah! But enough of my childhood plays. What of Mr Nuniwokingkac? He is a mysterious fellow, oh yes. You see his photo here, he say 
little at all, but always smoke the pipe. It is filled with rough shag - you know this bird, like cormorant? It smell not very good, but Mr. Nuniwokingkac is true not minding this, and always careful of the hygienic close to the food packing and cooking. Many years ago, Mr Nuniwokingkac come to Quebec with me, after he save my skin from the muskrats in the night. They was mad! I was surrounded by the pesky beasts who was happy to bite me dead, right there, my god, for trying to trap them. They gnaw into my hut, you understand, and make alliance together to gnaw me in my sleeping bag. But Mr Nuniwokingkac he come, and he says to them to go! Yes, it's true, in his language of the Inuit, and , my olds, they do! And Mr Nuniwokingkac, he cleaned up the hut, and threw away the methanol, and they never come back again, much!
little at all, but always smoke the pipe. It is filled with rough shag - you know this bird, like cormorant? It smell not very good, but Mr. Nuniwokingkac is true not minding this, and always careful of the hygienic close to the food packing and cooking. Many years ago, Mr Nuniwokingkac come to Quebec with me, after he save my skin from the muskrats in the night. They was mad! I was surrounded by the pesky beasts who was happy to bite me dead, right there, my god, for trying to trap them. They gnaw into my hut, you understand, and make alliance together to gnaw me in my sleeping bag. But Mr Nuniwokingkac he come, and he says to them to go! Yes, it's true, in his language of the Inuit, and , my olds, they do! And Mr Nuniwokingkac, he cleaned up the hut, and threw away the methanol, and they never come back again, much! 
So, he leave his home, Igluknuk, and return to Quebec with me to seek where he find new friends and opportunes. And so we are, my olds, your veritable Nuniwokingkac and Shellac of the Frugal Colonial Foods, and, in true, you have so kindly read so far that I now share with you our first receipt of the forest.
I hope you will enjoy this one, with no risk of illness at all!
